It's about to be 1 AM (well when I started) and I'm awake conversing with a good friend of mine. I have the song Shine On by Mathias Adernele on constant replay. Today has been a bit rough on my mind. Well, first off I'll explain why I decided to blog; I love to write & I'll write whenever my hands aren't too lazy to pen. I also feel like I have many thoughts that other people share but don't like to share or whatever. My friend Chi also motivated me to blog so here I am :) Moving on...
Today certainly has been an interesting day. I slept in till 2 PM & organized old class notes. My parents arrived home maybe 6 or so hours later & I realized they weren't at best terms with each other and I definitely had some cheering up to do. Little did I know, later on that night, being right now, I would need some cheering up of my own.
I declared this to be a great time of change. I realized that things are changing big time around me. Not only am I growing up, but so are the grown-ups around me and it turns out that I've been playing a role in this grand change. The main overseer of this all is surely God. I think He has something overwhelming planned and to me, every day its like I'm some lottery-crazed fanatic who is scratching at her lotto card, hoping to discover something that will bring her great joy.
Not only this but if my little heart was a cartoon character, it would be holding its breath right now because the person it has this great appreciation & love for does not feel the same for it, so it thinks. Basically, I'm facing unrequited love, "love that is not openly reciprocated, even though reciprocation is usually deeply desired. The beloved may or may not be aware of the admirer's deep affections." (thanks Wikipedia) I honestly don't know what "This Guy" feels. I don't know if he even knows how he feels. You can call me love dizzy & I think I'll be that way for a way.
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